Woody Allen Quotations

-I was thrown out of college for cheating on a metaphysical exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

-Eighty percent of success is showing up.

-My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.

-Most of the time I don’t have much fun. The rest of the time I don’t have any fun at all.

-How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?

-Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering – and it’s all over much too soon.

-If you’re not failing every now and again, it’s a sign you’re not doing anything very innovative.

-When I’m in New York I want to be in Europe, and when I’m in Europe I want to be in New York.

-Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.

-More than any other time in history mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.

-I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
Woody Allen