-When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
-To mistrust science and deny the validity of the scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You’d better go look for work as a plant or wild animal.
-Women’s clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat.
-Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and illiterate sport fishermen.
-Good manners can replace morals. It may be years before anyone knows if what you’re doing is right. But if what you are doing is nice, it will be immediately evident.
-Western civilization not only provides a bit of life, a pinch of liberty and the occasional pursuance of happiness, it’s also the only thing that’s ever tried to. Our civilization is the first in history to show even the slightest concern for average, undistinguished, none-too-commendable people like us.
-Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.
-Drugs have taught an entire generation of Americans the metric system.